OhEmGee, I'm lyk, BACK!

Not that I was gone. But whatevs.

Maybe I would enjoy French more if they taught us practical stuff, like how to be like this guy.
But then again, that's not in french. And for some reason, everything we do has to be in french.

Maybe I would just be better off taking a course on Monty Python and other Amazing British Comedies.

How cool would that be? "What are you majoring in, Jess?" "Oh, MP and other ABC." "Wow, sounds complex and rewarding." "Fo sho." I would eventually have to teach the course. And that would be the best job ever.

"What are we going to do today, Professor?" "Oh, I was thinking we could watch Holy Grail again, only with the speed doubled so they sound like chipmunks." "Ok, cool. I'll take copious notes. And may I say, you look really good today. Very professor chic." "Fo sho." I would be the best professor ever. Hands down. Except for maybe the vast majority of the Hogwarts teachers. Except like, Quirrell and that beezy Umbridge who always wore pink. I wouldn't be as good as Dumbledore or Snape or Lupin. But I would still be pretty darn good.

So I was going to talk about how much I love drama/theater, but in searching for a good picture to go with drama, I found a LLAMA! (Alpaca, actually.) And it was SO CUTE! Which reminded me that I should inform y'all of my new life goals.
But first, ISN'T THAT LITTLE ALPACA SOOOO CUTE!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?! He's just so fluffy and adorable. You just want to squeeze him and tell him he's cute and feed him hay and grass and then knit him a sweater and then make him into a sweater and oh my goodness.
His cute levels are almost too high. And I have no clue what that girl is doing, except for asking to be spit on. I mean, really. She's pretty much staring into his mouth. Which is a bad idea with animals that spit. But maybe she's too young to know that. Or maybe she likes spit. Ew.

So I want to go into agriculture of some sort. My goal would be to work with animals, with a focus on fiber animals (sheep, llamas, alpacas, yaks, etc.) As you can see, I make a stunning farmer (after an hour of intense photoshop magic. The only thing I forgot was a sheep dog. Drat.) And of course whenever I say "I want to go into agriculture!" Everyone goes "Um, double-you-tee-eff? You want to be a farmer?" And then I go on and on about the fiber industry, and eventually people start to just accept the idea and get over the fact that I'm just a city girl with no farm experience.

Well. I'm pretty much blogged out for the day. I've just been thinking about how I miss telling y'all about myself.

Sigh.

the boy in the striped pajamas

Sad. Unfathomably sad.

So guess what?

I turn 17 in three days.

And I'm not all that excited. And I really didn't have a big wish list this year. I'm pretty content. I wouldn't mind having someone come and clean my room, that would be a nice gift. And not the kind of cleaning mom offers, the kind where she gets to throw out anything she doesn't think I need. What she doesn't seem to realize is that everything in my room has a purpose or a meaning, and I love it.

Which means my room is still a complete mess. Whatever.
I'm going to a friend's going away party today. It made me miss all my graduated seniors even more. Darn.

I have three days of being 16 left. And I'm probably going to spend them playing massive amounts of Harvest Moon: Another Wonderful Life on my GameCube. Yay for imaginary farming!

Oh journalism camp, my only true love.

As I write this, I am listening to Aqualung's 'Strange & beautiful' (The "Jacob Wipf song," don't ask why. I really have no clue why it makes me think of him.) on repeat, so you can expect this to be a bit... I don't know. Just keep it in mind.

Let's start with the negatives.

1. Shitty dorms: We got stuck in the crappy old dorms built in 1913 because they were painting the nice ones. By 'we' I mean the girls.
   
2. Asbestos in the shitty dorms: There was literally a warning sticker on the back of my door telling me not to disturb the ceiling.
   
3. Showers in the shitty dorms: Communal with minimal curtains. Not fun.
   
4. Nasty food: There seemed to be a different kind of food that looked a good bit like vomit every day. I had a lot of plain old salad.
5. Missing all my seniors and feeling guilty about not missing them when I was having a really good time: Self-explanatory.

And now for the positives.

1. New friends: I met some people from another school that I spend a good deal of time hanging out with (read: stalking). But really, they're pretty cool.
   
2. Journalism in general: I love it. I really do. Every time I do an event like this, I realize just how much I love this industry.
   
3. Sports writing in particular: I look a smaller class (minor session) on sports writing, and realized that it might actually be fun to do.
   
4. REALLY AWESOME NEW STAFF!: They're all super. And awesome. And I love them all.
   
5. My maternal instincts being tested numerous times: I often felt like a mother hen as I watched a mass of girls follow me around the campus, because for some reason, I never got lost. And so they followed me. And at one point, I actually stood in a sprinkler, blocking it, while the other girls ran to the safety of dryer ground. My shirt was rather soaked, but I really felt like I had done something good. And at another point, I found myself literally herding girls out of the path of a firetruck that they all seemed not to see.
   
6. Cute journalism guys: There seem to be a good few of them. And I can pick a hot guy out of a room in an instant. It's like I have a built in radar.
7. Learning that I'm an awesome dancer: I was not aware of this. I still don't believe that my awkward mix of interpretive dance mixed with moves made up in my bedroom after 1 am is all that impressive. But it was enough that the majority of the staff came to watch me. Which was weird. Our staff was actually the first group on the dance floor. Let me tell you this - there is nothing more startling than dancing with a group of people, doing your own thing, having a good time, and then looking up, and realizing that the majority of the people are watching you, and mirroring your moves. I could never be a dance instructor. And also - I love dancing with gay guys.
8. Group karaoke: Aint no mountain high enough to keep the Nordic staff off that stage.
   
9. Junk food, junk food, junk food: Is it possible to get the freshman 15 just from being on a college campus? I might be well on my way there...
   

I'm tired. But happy.

GrumbleGrumbleGrumbleANGST.

What an imaginative title I've come up with, eh? And also- all this anonymous commenting is getting a bit out of hand.

So yeah, the angst is back. Brought on by, what else?, parents. And driver's ed. Ugh. And the combination of the tow is just deadly. Because I don't like driving. Not a bit. And my parents make it 30x more stressful just being there. It's like, YES, I see the car. NO, I am not going to hit it. YES, I see the stop light, I am stopped, duh. Because I mean, I am by no means a good driver. I still have trouble remembering which way the signal thingy goes. And as much as I try, I still can't do the SMOG (signal, mirror, mirror, over shoulder, go) thing the correct way. And the fact that I was almost hit on my last drive means mother has to have a spaz attack every time the subject is breached. I'm so over this bullshit. I need to blow this popsicle stand, like, now.

But luckily, salvation has come just in time in the form of journalism camp. YES! It's that time of year again, and I am promising, here and now -HOLD ME TO THIS- that there will not be another Dan. There can only be one Dan. And one Dan is plenty for one life time. (if you haven't a clue what I'm blathering on about, go through my old posts until you get to this time last year.... Or don't. I've def. improved as a writer in that time. I think.)

But I will be blathering (love that word today) on about pretty much everything else. And I will admit, I've got a few romantic prospects lined up already, and I'm just waiting to see how it all plays out.

I did end up going to coffee with Jacob and Peter, as well as Shannon, who is lovely in every way. It was very nice. And informative. I learned bunches. Yay for all having blogs!

And I have drivers ed in the morning (blech), but then I'm going ice skating with my pals, and then the next morning, I will be on my way to camp! I was trying to describe my excitement level to my friends today, and they didn't get it. It's not jumping up and down screeching excited, it's this rolling boil inside of me that keeps threatening to spill over. What a great description.

And also - more angst caused by friends I may have been friends with for too long. Ugh, long story I'm not willing to tell. I need sleep, and my ribs hurt (they always hurt these days. Why?!) so I am going to take some Tylenol and settle down for.... 6 hours of sleep at the most. And a little less angst because I've dropped a friend who was causing me a lot of internal turmoil.

Well, hope you all have a really great few days. I know I will. Or at least I'm really hoping I do.

Cheers.

Today

I toured my city. But this time, I actually really enjoyed myself.

I went with friends, not family, and didn't have an agenda. Except for at one point, when the agenda was: FIND THE GOD DAMNED FOUNTAIN, IT IS TOO GOD DAMNED HOT. We walked through 'the wrong part of town' and then stopped at a 7-11, got our slurpee on, and then trudged forth in the really lovely heat. We made lots of friends, a couple of which were completely nuts and talked to themselves. A few were completely blazed and just gazed at us longingly as we passed. One of them followed us and called "wait! wait!" Obviously we sped up. One really cool dude at the back of the bus was listening to our conversation and kept talking to me about things I was saying. Example: me: (sarcastic) "Wow, That's a pretty awesome park." him: "that there's a dog park. there are people parks, and dog parks. that's a dog park if i know one." me: (smile) "Ha.... ha.... yes."

Between getting completely soaked in the fountain, eating a massive slice of pizza, napping in the shade and the grass, playing HELLA games at GameWorks, and riding way too many buses for my liking, we all survived. And it just kind of made me really glad to be alive and to have such great, genuine friends. And it also made me sunburned. <3

Gosh darnit,

I had another good day. Ugh. Where is all that angst? I miss it so... Actually, I had enough drama and angst and confusion and all that good stuff for a whole month on Friday night. No details, but it was more than mildly stressful.

Maybe this lack of angst comes from the new group of people I'm hanging out with. Or maybe it has something to do with the wisdom I've taken from the group that's leaving me. Side note: looking forward to seeing Jacob and Peter some time in the nearish future. Imma miss those guys. =(

Today, for the first time in my life, I was pushed into a lake/body of water fully clothed. Pushed being a bit of an exaggeration, they very forcibly persuaded me into it. They being my new group. Awesome guys, really. Anyway, it wasn't too much fun. I mean, initially there was the slight thrill of being completely soaked, but I got over that quickly when I realized that I was completely soaked. Yuck.

And then I walked to the bathroom (completely soaked), and all of the Mexican families having their beach BBQs stared at me. I felt rather self conscious.

In non-outing related news:
My mommy is very overprotective. Let's leave it at that.

Damnit, Jacob Wipf

you always make me cry. Example one, whatever it was you wrote in my yearbook had me bawling my eyes out. (Not to worry, Peter, so did yours.) And best little sister you never had? You could write Hallmark cards. AND - I totally thought you should have asked me to prom when you were like, the only one not going. Great minds...

In un-Jacob related news:
Actually not too much to say today.

My driver's ed instructor is a tall skinny dude who talks really fast and makes really long-winded jokes about nothing. And says "yayy" in a really breathy voice like, 20 times in the two hour session. It's hard to explain, but very odd overall. And my mom keeps asking me if I think I'll be able to learn from him, as if I'm going to drop the course because he's a bit odd.

Gah, I'm not making sense today. And I'm also learning waayyyy too much about someone over FB IM. Yikes.

Also- mystery Anonymous commenter - I like you. Whoever you are. <3

EDIT: I'm sitting here, eating some plain lettuce. And It's really, really good. I feel like a bunny. And not the slutty Hugh Hefner kind. Or maybe I do... ;)

Here's something that annoys me:

Ridiculously hot guys who are also ridiculously religious. For example: my younger brother's counselor at church camp. I know, I know, obviously a church camp counselor is going to be crazy religious, but I didn't expect him to bring it up in small talk. (And seriously 9/10 church camp counselors are ridiculously good looking)

It's hard enough to flirt with a college guy who's waaaaaaay out of your league, but when he brings god into it? No, thanks.

But he was still so nice to look at.... They all were, really...

I need to stop having awesome days

or else this blog will be filled with butterflies and smiley faces, and god forbid... Glitter graphics!

But I had another very awesome day with that same group, and it's just making me really happy. Which is weird, because I'm so used to being angsty and depressed and bored.

I was going to make this long and meaningful, but there's a Harry Potter marathon on ABC Family, soooooooooo...

My goal this summer

is a lot different that my goal for the last four summers has been. And if you want to know what THAT goal was, just think about it. I'm a single, emphasis on S I N G L E, teenage girl.

This summer, I want to write a song. And not the really really really crappy christian pop stuff I wrote that one summer when I was in a christian pop band. Yeah, I was. No, I'm not christian. Go figure.

I'm thinking I'll put together some of the stuff I shot at the zoo and post it here, because I don't really find it YouTube worthy. Though I'm sure my subscribers would like to see that I'm not dead. And my aunt still has my web cam. Which she took without asking. Not cool.

Lets talk about days that are amazing,

because I had one.

This post will hopefully be short. And if you haven't read my last monster-of-a-post post, do so, because it is worth reading. ANYHOO,

Today, I did two really awesome things, and two really physically painful things.

POSITIVE:
1. I went to the zoo with my two best friends.
- The zoo on it's own is awesome. Add in your best friends, a video camera and two regular digital cameras, and you've got an all together terrific outing.
- For the first time in a very long time, I just let myself be a fun loving kid. I didn't have anyone to watch out for, I didn't have a plan, I didn't have to do anything if I didn't want to. All I had to do was have fun with my best friends.
- Obviously, when there are numerous bronze animals chilling throughout the zoo, a good about of pictures were taken, in which I must look like an absolute idiot, but I had a great time taking them, who who cares?
- I decided today that my new favorite animal is the three-banded armadillo. SO CUTE! (In the dark, at least. Maybe it's not as cute in daylight...)

2. I went on a picnic party/park outing thing.
- I have to say that the group of people who were at this party were seriously one of the best groups anyone could ever wish to hang out with. They're energetic, entertaining, and genuinely amazing people.
- I got to play hot lava monster for the first time in a long time, and that was a blast. And also very exhausting.
- I waded into the really nasty kind of squishy yellowish river and tried to catch minnows with my bare hands. Felt like Huck Fin or something with my jeans rolled up, wading after minuscule fish. It was awesome.
- Literally fell down laughing and almost rolled down a hill numerous times.
- Stopped caring about what I looked like about half an hour in, and that made it all so much more fun and easier to enjoy.
- Shared a really great muffin at a really cool cafe with two really spectacular guys.
- Played trivial pursuit and felt like a winner even thought I hardly knew any of the answers.

NEGATIVE:
1. Flew out of a kiddie swing.
- I decided to jump off the swing after it had slowed down a bit, and somehow managed to trip over my feet as I landed, and somehow ended up doing a triple somersault, and landing on my face/shoulder.
- For the first time since I was 12 I have a battle wound earned on a playground in the form of a really nice set of scratches and cuts to the upper forearm and elbow.

2. Did something really stupid.
-While searching for something to throw off the tall bridge I was standing on, I spotted a cluster of those helicopter seed things. I decided that those would be cool to throw off.
- After a few failed attempts to reach the cluster, I jumped higher than I have ever jumped before, and got it! Yay me!
- NOT.
- What had before, from afar, appeared to be some kind of fuzzy coating on the seeds turned out to be the plants protection for the seeds from animals.
- My entire hand was covered, base of my palm to fingertips, with sharp, spiny yellow hairs.
- It took two plus hours to remove the majority of these offending hair things, and I am STILL finding them almost FIVE HOURS LATER.
- I hate plants.

But today, the positive almost overwhelmingly outweighed the negative, making this the best day of my summer yet. Hopefully this outing will happen again with this group.

I have a very good feeling it will.

Let's talk about change,

because I don't deal with it very well.

(And also, this does mean I'm back for good. I swear to God (Yes, I did just capitalize that. Going back to my Heritage Christian preschool roots?) I am going to keep this thing updated.)

So let's begin with the usual rundown of all the stuff I've done since my last real post. Actually, after looking at the last post I would call "real," I kind of figure that that in itself would take up a whole post. And nobody wants to read about that.

So, change. Change. I tried looking for a good definition to throw in, but there wasn't really any that fit what I was looking for. Maybe the "to pass from one phase to another" one. Because that's the one I have the most problems with.
For the most part, I can handle change internally. Going from grade to grade never bothers me. Neither does changing schools. Changes in others rarely bother me, with some obvious exceptions. But it's the changes that directly affect my life, more specifically my social life, that get to me.
As we all know, the school year is over, unless you go to year-round school, but that's another blog to be written. And usually, the end of school is a great thing. It means freedom from teachers, homework, bitchy popular girls you would rather not see on a daily basis, "friends" who you used to love seeing on a daily basis, creepy guys, cute guys you don't have a chance in hell with who seem to be placed in your classes purely to taunt you, and all that school related stress. But this year, happy is not a word I would use to describe my end of year feelings. Of course, I didn't expect a HSM2 end of school moment (thought I would have enjoyed it), I just expected to feel some kind of relief. But instead, I crashed headfirst into what I like to call post-senior depression.
Now, after my post-Potter depression, I wasn't sure if I could ever be so down in the dumps. But alas, post-senior depression proved to be even worse that the end of my favorite fictional series ever.
Of course, this whole thing could have been avoided by me not getting onto the paper staff as a sophomore. I could have NOT met some of the most amazing people to grace this planet, NOT made some of the most excellent friends in the history of forever, NOT had the best year of school I could imagine. But when I think about I gained, I think the loss is a little more bearable.
For anyone who truly knew me before and after my Nordic experience, it is apparent that I am not the same little freshman who went blindly into that interview and spilled her guts about her desperation to get a boyfriend in front of the co-editors and then-adviser, Jen.
I think the most startling change appeared after the mind blowing three days at jcamp. At that time, I was going to see a group math tutor bi-weekly, and she noticed the change right off the bat. During a break in the class, she would usually pull out the snacks, and while the boys ambled off to the ping pong table and the girls stuffed their faces with chips, Nancy, the tutor would strike up a conversation with anyone willing that would eventually consume the entire rooms attention. Before jcamp, I had sat on the outskirts, looking the picture of teen angst, rolling my eyes and texting my friends about how unimaginably lame this dumb math tutoring was.
But after jcamp, I found myself leading the discussion. Nancy actually pulled me aside and expressed interest in what is was that had brought me out of my shell. With a smile, I was able to honestly answer with one word, "jcamp."

Jcamp was where I met Dan (still a dear, dear friend of mine) along with a few others who have completely changed my outlook on life. Namely, Sam, Jacob, Kiku, Rachel, Angela,
Alec and Amy. Yes, there were more at the camp, but these few were the ones that have really made an impact. Sam, Rachel and Angela kind of take on older sister roles while Kiku, Alec and Amy make every day a bit more of an adventure of the mind. And Jacob? Well, Jacob just makes my life a whole lot better purely by being alive and being my friend.
Something about the atmosphere at camp mixed with the feeling of gaining a second family really got to me. All of a sudden, I forgot I was the youngest and forgot I was the outsider, because suddenly, I had become part of the whole. But what I didn't realize was that the whole wasn't even complete.
A number of staff members had not gone to camp. And some of them became just as important as the ones from camp. Mostly Peter. But also Breanne and Ian. But mostly Peter. Peter is in the same category as Jacob as far as pretty much making my world go round. But he was also the most, how shall I say this... Willing to keep me in my place and remind me I was a sophomore? But he also gave some of the greatest advice. Ian doesn't even get a category, because he is Ian. If you know Ian, you know what I'm talking about. And Breanne (after a rocky start during my annoyingly long crush on Peter (OH HOLY SHIT IT'S OUT! Might as well throw out that I had the hots for Jacob for quite some time (read: also annoyingly long) as well, because this is my blog, and I speak my thoughts and secrets and feelings and God knows what else.)) became one of my closest and most trusted gal-pals.
And with all of these amazing people behind me, I became someone I can truly be proud of.

And here's where change comes in. Change like that which I saw in myself, and which others saw, is good. I like that kind of change. Everyone likes that kind of change, which is why we call it a positive change, or a change for the better, such as Draco Malfoy's change of heart at the end of the series, or finding out Snape was good. But then, there is negative change, like Dumbledore or Sirius or Lupin OR ONE OF THE OTHER AMAZING CHARACTERS WHICH WERE SO RUDELY KILLED OFF. I apologise, sometimes post-Potter depression makes me so angry.

Change. This terrible thing which takes away the people who have made you this great person. Also known as graduation. But I'll stick with change for now. But the worst part about this particular change is that while you're incredibly depressed because you know they'll be gone, you're incredibly proud of them for becoming such great people on their own, people you know will do so well for themselves. And so while you're sobbing your eyes out over their messages scribbled in your yearbook, you have this happiness inside you. Because you know she'll be a brilliant actress, and she'll be a stellar photographer, and his writing career will be the stuff of legends, and he can do whatever the hell he puts his mind to.
And so you put on your happy face, and tell them to stay in touch (while you are really trying to say, "If you don't keep in touch with me, I will cyberstalk the hell out of you.") and watch them go off to find out what life is really like after high school. And I will forever think of them as my seniors.


That was possibly (probably) the best blog post I've ever done. I think I shall reward myself with ice cream.

Big news!

Jaykay. This isn't big news, but it could be.

I've got another co-blog in the works. Which should be cool, because this time my co-author is someone who spends just as much time on the web as I do. Which is a lot.

And also- I'm going to try and keep this blog going as well. Because Artur has set some ground rules which pretty much rule out any of my normal type of blogging, this will stay on as my ranting, I've had a bad day, OMG the Jonas brothers are SO cute, etc. blog. And also hopefully I'll have some more interesting content on here as well. LOL.

Anyhoo, I'm sorry I've been gone so long, because I know y'all missed me so darn much!
(Because in reality I'm pretty much talking to an empty room here because no one reads this. Ah well.)

Maybe something interesting will happen soon, and I'll actually have something to talk about.

Hopefully.

So,

not much to say.

Charlie, you're probably going to be the only person who reads this, and i just posted the worlds longest comment on your last post, so yeah.

And I look like a pedophile on my drivers permit. It's actually quite funny.

<3

If anyone else reads this, let me know?

I just thought I would let you know

that I think today is going to be a good day.

I woke up at exactly 9 o'clock, perfectly warm, even after I got out of bed. My hair didn't look terrible at all. When I opened my bedroom door, there was sunlight streaming into the house through all the front windows. And I was still perfectly warm.

And I'm most likely going ice skating tonight with a group of people who are lovely.

And I've become addicted to Stumble. Which is amazing.

And I literally LOL'd at this for over an hour. I cried I was laughing so hard.

Hopefully everyone else is having a good day too!

Let's talk about books

Because I'm still avoiding my article which is due tomorrow. but it's short. and it's news. So it won't take long.

Firstly- Harry Potter.
Wow. Wowwy wow wow wow. So yesterday (AND TODAY. I LOVE THAT. I JUST TURN ON THE TV AND BOOM! HARRY POTTER!!) was part of ABC Family's Harry Potter weekend. Which has me thinking about the series which I loved, still love, and will continue to love for years to come.

There has never been another series which I have invested so much time and love into. (Nerdy, I know. Bug off.) And I was thinking about something, and I couldn't figure out if I would really want to do this.

I was thinking: How cool would it be, to be able to erase the plot of a book from your head, and then be able to reread it, as if for the first time. But the drawback I found was that you would lose the things you had first noticed when you read it for the actual first time. I guess if I was magically able to do that, I could put it back.

But really, just sit there and think about it. You could be happy with a library of three books for the rest of your life! (Not that I would EVER just read three books. I'm guessing I'm pushing the 1,500 mark, not counting the little kid 'learn to read' books.)

"We'd recommend... This one." What movie/book is that line from? Oooooh, trickyyyyy.

But wouldn't that be cool? I would love to reread the series, just to get a fresh perspective on it again.

Sigh, one can only wish.

Read anything good lately? I'm still working on The Wheel of Time. It's excellent.

Here's something to dampen my spirit

So my latest facebook update was "Does anyone else think the old Dumbledore was better?" and a few people replied to it, and then, I get an update that says "Max ********** has commented on your status". Actually, I get two such updates. And I kind of have a thing for Max **********, so I was excited that, for the first time, he was commenting on something of mine.

But when I go to see what it says, there isn't anything. Neither of the two comments are there. But my email had gotten the updates as well.
The first was a jumble of letters, the second, not so much.

If you read this, Max, thanks. And deleting them before I could see them was classy too.


Thanks.

nostalgia

i figured i might as well make a new account. i have soooooooooo much free time these days.

not.

DUDE. I AM SO EXCITED!

Twitter

(two posts in one day? what is this madness?!)

I was telling my dad about Twitter, and when I tried to explain 'followers' and what they do he said, "You mean, like, stalkers, right?"

Oh dad.

AND IN OTHER BREAKING NEWS;

I'm going to pull a Jerry Cooke and do a photo of the day thing, on my bran-spankin-new Flickr (jeblock24, duh). Starting tomorrow. Because I look terrible today.

Cheers!

Because no one is going to tag me

I'll do it for myself. [=

Jessica needs (there were a few good ones...) 1. TO PUT SOME CLOTHES ON and 2. to stop dressing like a slut

Jessica looks like looks like yall be singing spank me baby one more time. (WTF?!)

Jessica says Tony would never tell her to lose weight. (This is REALLY weird because I have a brother named tony.)

Jessica wants to get rough. (Ummmm... Sure.....)

Jessica does Dallas.

Jessica hates 1. metal 2. mexicans 3. joe 4. work and 5. fat people. (wow, i's not a very nice person.)

Jessica asks friends to take part in her baby ritual. (the majority of stuff I get comes from Jessica Alba's site. Weird.)

Jessica likes 1. it loud 2. 'em smart 3. her sweats

Jessica eats a live octopus

Jessica wears 1. the unitard 2. sunglasses at night (hopefully not at the same time...)

Jessica was arrested for biting her sister’s arm in a fight. (I have no sister. IT'S ALL LIES, LIES I TELL YOU!

Jessica loves her some taco. (Damn straight, son.)

For those of you not in the know, this is the Google tag game, started by John Green, I believe. You put your name, plus the verb in quotation marks and google it, and hilarity ensues.