Because Charlie gave me a reason to rant on the movie Ratz. Thank you!
So the movie is Ratz, and here is the plot. Luckily, I had read the book, otherwise I might have had to listen to the horrible play by play from the girl who played main character Marci.
We get a bit of history about her and her BFF Summer (who's father invented fake saliva) and a bunch of random information NO ONE CARES ABOUT. By this point I wanted yo scream "Get to the movie already!" because it was like watching a really bad movie trailer before watching the movie. But eventually we actually get into the movie, and let me tell you, if my orthodontist had done that to my mouth, i would have been very upset.
So I'll skip to the next important (I use air quotes around important) bit. If I didn't skip to the 'important' parts we would be here all day. So Marci and Summer are upset because they don't have dates to the Spring Fling, which is held during the spring break. When they could be out doing other things. Weird. But they work for this woman Doris, who loves her soaps. Strangely, she looks a whole lot like her favorite soap star. Hmmmmm.....
Doris discovers a ring in her 'antique'/junk store and discovers it has... Wait for it, wait for it! MAJIK POWERZ!!! (Just got side tracked by a Sonic commercial, which they like to tease us West Coast kids with, because there aren't any for a trillion miles). When you wear it, and wish for something, you get it. She wants perfect vision- BAM. She wants different hair - POW. The girls discover her and while at the store, fight about the dance and boys, etc. Doris tries to make boys for them to go with, but they don't appear. And she is sad, and they leave her with her soaps so she can settle into depression alone.
BUT she wishes for the soap star's body, clothes hair, etc. and WOWEE! She gets it. AND she just so happens to have turned a couple of rats into an adorable pair of boys, with their frosted hair and movie star grins, they scream 90's. But the girls argue about 'keeping them' and Summer's mom ends up in the mix, believing they are exchange students from Sweden. They learn fast, and can suddenly say Sweden. Golly.
The girls take them to the mall, where the popular girl is like 'OMG they are cute boys. OMG they are with those sad little girls. OMG i will save them.' in usualy mean girl getting what she wants fashion. AAAARRGHGGH. I hate those stereotypical girls. But so the boys are attrackted to her cheezeburger, which was total sexual innuendo if you ask me. The loser girls end up luring them away with fries.
They buy a rat training book, and the subject of the rat boys only wanting to eat, run on their wheel and mate is breached. omg horny teenage rat boys. ohnoes.
So they pretty much go to the dance and the whole story gets tied up with sneaking out, being grounded, Doris falling in love with the handyman. Mind you, this is only one plot, the main one. There were about 4 going on through the movie. But I only paid attention to the boys.
But the mean girl gets it in the end, and Doris gets the handyman. And the boys become rats again. And Marci keeps them in her room.
It wasn't the worst movie ever, but between the flower power animated scene switching and the bad acting, I found it hard to stay interested. The book Rat Boys or something, is better, but not by much. I read it in an afternoon after buying it at one of those super book sale places.
Night y'all.
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